What entertains us will always be subjective

I KNOW, I know, stating the bleeding obvious.

There is no right or wrong answer to the question of entertainment - in this instance I am referring to the vast world of comedy.

Today I saw three different types of entertainment that could be stuffed into the pigeonhole marked 'Comedy'.

There was a pantomime, the latest 'winner' from ITV and the most recent material from a writer and performer who is one of the best acts from my generation.

To the pantomime first. And it was a most enjoyable visit to the Theatre Royal in St Helens with the Liverpool Deaf Children's Society to see Cinderella.

Oh yes, we all know the story etc etc but in this most miserable of the calendar's 12 months - by a country mile - I would recommend pantomime to help get rid of the January blues, at least for a few hours or so.

I've been having a rough couple of days, capped by a 24-hour flu-like bug that drained me of all energy between Thursday night and Friday night. I felt bloody awful and a coach trip to St Helens didn't fill me with much enthusiasm.

But by God, how glad I was I made the trip. The show was top notch with the bloke who used to play Andy McDonald in Coronation Street marvellous as Buttons and the illusionist Richard De Vere making a wonderfully dastardly Dandini.

And it was his character who said what I reckon is the funniest lines I've ever heard in a panto, to do with his choice of headgear. The payoff line was "Wear the fox hat" so you can work it out for yourselves what that was supposed to mean. The way it was delivered only added to the hilarity of the moment.

All in all, we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves and with the LDCS getting a special mention it made the trip one to remember.

The second piece of entertainment with comedic input is ITV's latest attempt to drag "celebrities" into the limelight with something we can all have a laugh at. We've seen them dining out on the private parts of unfortunate Aussie roadkill as well as sliding on their backsides on frozen water as Tony Gubba delivers his expertise on the finesse of the triple-salko.

Now, they're attempting to copy Tom Daley by leaping off ridiculously high boards into 20 feet of water being judged by comedienne Jo Brand in a show called Splash!. No, honestly, you truly, truly could not possibly make this up.

Ironically, or coincidentally, one of the stars of Cinderella, Tina Malone, is on next week's show and De Vere took the piss out of her during the panto for going on it!

Of course, viewers can, ahem, interact and spend yet more money ringing in saying whose dive was the best.

Or in the case of tonight's show, whose swimming cossie was the skimpiest - Sky Sports presenter Charlotte Jackson won that hands down in a number that could only have been designed by Edward Scissorhands.

Is this how far TV entertainment has sunk - to the depths of a swimming pool? I fully expect Chris Eubank to be limbering up for his trail of youth hostels in the UK or maybe another show as Eric Bristow, fresh from his appearance in the jungle, trains celebrities to sling arrows in some darts challenge or other with Jim Bowen drafted in to ask some questions in a sort of 2013 version of Bullseye. Given time, it could happen.

The third piece of entertainment was the DVD bought for me by Louise at Christmas of Mid Morning Matters.

This is Steve Coogan's latest stint as arguably his greatest creation - although I really loved Paul Calf back in the day - dreadful DJ and failed TV host Alan Partridge. Set in the studio of a digital radio station in, where else but Norfolk, Coogan is in fine form once again with comedy set-pieces so well written with killer, individual lines that set him apart. The name 'City Break', for example, was used in one and it was so well observed, once more contributing to the comedic value of the piece.

Coogan is one of only a relatively few number of comedy performers of today's generation I could watch again and again. Larry David is another and I'll be blogging about him too in the future. I also like Sarah Millican, both as a performer and for other reasons too...

In fact, it tells you something that by far and away the funniest thing I saw on TV in the whole of 2012 was actor William Shatner's guest appearance as the host on an unforgettable edition of Have I Got News For You. His line about hookers in a small Devon town must be viewed on You Tube if you've yet to see it.

To wind up, as I've been wittering on for a bit, I know. It really is true that what entertains us will always be subjective but at least we can all agree on one thing: Jim Davidson, despite what it might say on Wikipedia, is not a comedian.